{1}{1}29.97
{68}{79}}FUTURAMA||
{80}{256}}FUTURAMA|If accidentally watched,|induce vomiting
{270}{370}}*** TITLES AT WORK ***|LAST EDIT: 09-May-2003 01:32 CET
{390}{535}}55. - S4E11 - 3ACV22|The 30% Iron Chef
{978}{1052}Good morning earth
{1076}{1105}Welcome back.
{1108}{1228}Our next guest has been teaching the world to cook for over twenty years.
{1231}{1345}But apparently my wife hasn't been listening.
{1348}{1368}Oh, funny.
{1371}{1440}I will destroy her!
{1443}{1646}And now, extend of formulating greeting to master chef Elzar!
{1698}{1855}So, uh, Elzar, what will you be cooking for Morbo to devour with his mighty jaws?
{1858}{2002}Morbo, I'm gonna whip you up a nice unnamable horror from beyond.
{2005}{2079}With mango chutney.
{2184}{2339}Pathetic humans! Prepare to write down the recipe.
{2382}{2442}Hey, what's with all the pots and pans?
{2445}{2478}You're building a wife?
{2481}{2500}Part of one.
{2503}{2700}Meantime, I'm cooking a tasty Sunday brunch for my best friends.
{3035}{3155}Eh, brunch, right. I better warn - tell - warntell the others.
{3158}{3232}Oukey-dokey.
{3450}{3498}Um, nice.
{3501}{3642}Yes, it's a perfect scale model of the universe's largest bottle.
{3645}{3797}I put a tiny spaceship inside to keep it from being boring.
{3800}{3987}Get! For the last time Zoidberg, look with your eyes, not your claws!
{3990}{4089}Brace yourselves! Bender is making us brunch.
{4092}{4115}Ohh - oh, boy.
{4118}{4180}Oh God, my tract!
{4183}{4239}He's so proud of his awful cooking.
{4242}{4299}If we don't eat it, he'll be crushed.
{4302}{4347}All right, don't panic.
{4350}{4490}If we can get into the ship, we can fly North and hide under the polar icecaps for a few weeks.
{4493}{4582}-Good idea.|-Fine.|-What's a hold up.
{4585}{4659}Fleeing somewhere?
{4673}{4743}Eh um, with you blocking the only escape route?
{4746}{4775}Don't be silly.
{4778}{4836}In that case, brunch is served.
{4839}{4970}Let's go, move it out, stop crying Leela.
{4997}{5073}Zoidberg, are you coming?
{5076}{5150}Sure, me.
{5156}{5237}Because I don't want you touching that thing.
{5240}{5314}I know that.
{5324}{5437}Surrender your mysteries to Zoidberg!
{5637}{5711}Oh no! Professor will hit me...
{5714}{5831}But if Zoidberg fixes it, then perhaps gives.
{5834}{5908}Strong force krazy glue.
{6006}{6116}"Zoidberg don't touch!"|-What?
{6121}{6211}Today, I've personalized each of your meals.
{6214}{6368}For example, Amy, you're cute, so I baked you a pony.
{6371}{6416}C'mon, eat!
{6419}{6550}I slaved the whole day over a filthy stove.
{6617}{6644}This is terrible.
{6647}{6829}Good thing I secretly installed this worm hole in the table.
{6915}{6968}Where does the other end come out?
{6971}{7074}You know, I'm not quite sure.
{7077}{7151}Oh, dear me.
{7339}{7368}The pie's ready!
{7371}{7490}You guys like swarms of things, right?
{7515}{7662}Casual hello, it's me, Zoidberg, at naturally???
{7665}{7776}Ouch, ouch, uh, get off me, stop.
{7779}{7869}How interesting doctor Zoidberg.
{7872}{7946}Do go on.
{7978}{8038}Hey, check out the palm tree.
{8041}{8106}It only get sick, when I cooked brunch.
{8109}{8182}How's that for coincidence, professor.
{8185}{8280}With all your precious science.
{8627}{8773}Man, I don't wanna hurt Bender's feelings, but this food actually tastes better as vomit.
{8776}{8816}It's unbearble!
{8819}{9001}How much do you think it will cost to get my tongue removed?
{9501}{9525}A note from Bender.
{9528}{9579}A ransom note from Bender.
{9582}{9683}A plea for attention from Bender.
{9712}{9749}I am committing suicide.
{9752}{9777}I am getting a tattoo.
{9780}{9854}I am running away.
{9873}{9947}And this time I mean it.
{9965}{10039}And this time I mean it.
{10548}{10603}Ahh, who am I kidding?
{10606}{10696}It was stupid of me to ever dream of becoming a chef.
{10699}{10761}I don't have what it takes.
{10764}{10850}And nothing can change that.
{10907}{10977}Elzar's fine cuisine
{10980}{11011}Then it's settled!
{11014}{11081}Elzar will teach me to cook.
{11084}{11158}Absolutelly not.
{11190}{11232}But I watch your show...
{11235}{11273}You owe me!
{11276}{11320}I owe you nothing.
{11323}{11391}For starters, your antenna is in my crotch.
{11394}{11437}Also, I hate you.
{11440}{11571}And finaly, you can't cook for squat.
{11577}{11614}What was the first one again?
{11617}{11643}I hate you.
{11646}{11693}I thought there was number two!
{11696}{11785}I knocked it up a noch. Bam!
{11838}{11930}Aah, I never ??recompopulate?? this ship.
{11933}{12129}When the professor finds out, he'll turn me in nuclear ??..??.
{12132}{12227}Wait, what would the robot do?
{12254}{12328}Frame someone.
{12337}{12411}What up?
{12542}{12646}I'm walking on sunshine, mmm...
{12697}{12771}I hate bottles
{12860}{12888}It's over.
{12891}{13023}My dream of being a chef is deader than a cat I'm sittin' on.
{13026}{13064}??...?? old champ.
{13067}{13160}Let's get a friendly welcome to this new robo.
{13163}{13214}What did you call me?
{13217}{13294}A robo, you know, a robot hobo.
{13297}{13382}Ah, OK, I thought you said romo.
{13385}{13463}No offensing tended my filthy friend.
{13466}{13621}In fact, why not join us and ride the space rails.
{13704}{13744}Baltimore & Orion
{13747}{13816}Starlight express
{13819}{13893}Wrath-of-conrail
{14143}{14165}Get ready!
{14168}{14255}??We??s gonna jump off that switching prism up the head.
{14258}{14449}We're going nearly the speed the light, so roll when you land.
{14697}{14771}Aw!
{14832}{14888}Welcome to Bum base alpha.
{14891}{14950}The biggest hobo jungle in the quadrant.
{14953}{14997}Eh, I've seen bigger.
{15000}{15131}Oh, wait, I'm thinking a Eugene, Oregon.
{15435}{15523}Wait. A pie with hobo lifting aroma?
{15526}{15553}Who baked it?
{15556}{15592}Helmut Sparkel.
{15595}{15652}He used to be the greatest chef ever.
{15655}{15719}His restaurant was so high tone.
{15722}{15891}The only way get to get reservations was to create a parallel universe, where you already had reservations.
{15894}{15996}Yep, I once ate there back when I ??...??.
{15999}{16126}You, Sparkel, if you're such a great cook, how did you end up in this dump.
{16129}{16199}Ah, ages ago.
{16202}{16270}I was a host of the TV show.
{16273}{16390}Down home country kitchen mit Helmut Sparkel.
{16393}{16594}But one day the extreme sold of company that sponsored the shov decided it was too old fashioned.
{16597}{16654}Sparkel, you're fired!
{16657}{16847}We need the chef who can attract today's younger more extreme cooking show viewer.
{16850}{16888}Elzar!
{16891}{16965}Get lost old man. Bam!
{17001}{17070}Mein suffle!
{17073}{17184}Elzar had been seduced by the dark side of cooking.
{17187}{17332}??Silantrol??, mango salsa, raspberry vinegret.
{17335}{17388}That ??twizzler??.
{17391}{17593}As for me, I went temporarily insane and wound up here making pies out of shoes.
{17596}{17726}My story is alot like yours, only more interesting, 'cause it involves robots.
{17729}{17872}That jerk Elzar ruined my dream of being a chef, too.
{17875}{18039}Interesting, you wish to cook, but as a robot you have no sense of taste.
{18042}{18088}Yeah, it's so unfair.
{18091}{18144}I had eight other senses,
{18147}{18294}but I traded them all, even smision, to be able to taste.
{18297}{18333}You don't understand.
{18336}{18499}Without the distraction of taste, your mind is free to touch the zen of pure flavour.
{18502}{18567}You could become the greatest chef ever!
{18570}{18595}I could?
{18598}{18723}Yes! Just as Beethoven was a great composer because he was deaf.
{18726}{18827}And like Rembrandt was blind and had wooden hands.
{18830}{18877}Bender, hear me well.
{18880}{19053}I shall train you, but first you must forget everything you know about cooking.
{19056}{19077}Done.
{19080}{19172}Hover potatoes|-5 lbs.
{19375}{19449}Pepercorns
{20036}{20086}It that's right, Richardo.
{20089}{20146}A ship in the bottle.
{20149}{20178}What's that?
{20181}{20255}Uh, hang on, I look.
{20363}{20464}Hola, professor, que pasa?
{20586}{20795}I've gathered you all here in the accusing parlour because one of you is a miniature-ship wrecker.
{20798}{20845}I'm acting astonished!
{20848}{21063}Certain clues suggest that the ??? is none other than our own Filip J. Fry!
{21066}{21088}What?
{21091}{21293}Oh, it was a brilliant scheme, but you've made one fatal mistake - leaving this confession note!
{21296}{21339}Fry confesses|from the desk of John Zoidberg, M.D.
{21342}{21392}Fry, you scoundrel.
{21395}{21510}Well, I don't remember any of that, but I don't have the ??? with all to defend myself.
{21513}{21648}Then I have no choice but to charge you the full cost of the materials.
{21651}{21725}Ten dollars.
{21743}{21817}Here it go.
{21864}{21938}What I have done?!
{22058}{22154}Your training is complette, little desert spoon.
{22157}{22344}Now, just as the man who wishes to be the world chess champion must win at least one game of chess.
{22347}{22462}So must you serve at least one edible meal.
{22465}{22689}Succeed, and I shall reveal to you the age old secret of perfect flavour.
{22763}{22823}Slops on!
{22826}{22915}??Fine, look at he eats??
{23312}{23386}It is-- acceptable.
{23394}{23441}-Yeah!|-Hurray!
{23444}{23511}Yeah, hooo, another thing I'm great at.
{23514}{23594}Wait, why did you stop ezting, master.
{23597}{23726}Because my stomach is about to explode.
{23729}{23842}What? My dinner killed you! Aw men.
{23852}{24191}Oh, it hurts. But don't lose confidence. The important thing is, you'll defeat Elzar after I'm gone. And using this, you cannot fail.
{24194}{24278}Uh, a diamond vial of Mrs. Dash?
{24281}{24355}No. It is the essence of pure flavour.
{24358}{24579}A few drops will cause the inner perfection of any dish to blossom forth.
{24600}{24728}Uhh, there goes my, eeeh, life, uhhhh.
{24825}{24881}I'll avenge you master!
{24884}{25108}I swear in the presence of these drunken bumps, that I shall defeat Elzar.
{25111}{25190}Oh, I'm not drunk, I'm mentally ill.
{25193}{25288}But I likes that what you said.
{25351}{25504}Elzar, I'm a walking pile of your unfinished bussiness.
{25507}{25558}What you.
{25561}{25644}Helmut Sparkle has a message for you.
{25647}{25724}He says: Uuuu, I'm dead.
{25765}{25864}Sparkle, ha? What he do, blend himself to death?
{25867}{26037}No, he was eating some food I made and by a crazy coincidence his stomach exploded.
{26040}{26119}Now I'm here to avenge him.
{26122}{26200}OK, but it seems like you're the one who killed him.
{26203}{26308}Maybe so, but you are his sworn enemy!
{26311}{26436}I challenge you to a battle of the chefs.
{26504}{26665}Very well. We'll meet on the ancient televise battleground of kitchen coliseum.
{26668}{26791}Whosever meal is best will claim the title of iron cook.
{26794}{26830}Iron cook, hey?
{26833}{26936}I can't loose, I am 30% iron.
{26939}{27011}You're going down.
{27014}{27196}Ah, also I had a reservation for one, under doctor Bender.
{27322}{27416}Kitchen coliseum|Home of the kitchen university wildcats.
{27419}{27602}Please welcome the super intended of kitchen coliseum: chairman Koji.
{27605}{27825}No robot chef has ever competed here but today one has barged his way in to challenge for the title of "irona kukuru"
{27828}{27902}"irona kukuru"
{28073}{28126}Go carrots|Fish sauce|Daikon radish #1
{28129}{28197}Let's meet todays celebrities judges.
{28200}{28312}Captain of the Harlem Globetrotters... Ethan Bubblegum Tate!
{28315}{28366}Konichiwa, brother.
{28369}{28435}TV a/e-nche monster Morbo!
{28438}{28498}Greetings, pathetic host.
{28501}{28657}And a women who ended a thousand year gallactic war with her apple dandies - Martha Stewarts head!
{28660}{28737}The secret is fresh pork.
{28780}{28965}And now chairman Koji will present the theme ingredient to be used in every dish today.
{28968}{29217}If it's chicken, chicken ala King, if it's fish, fish ala King, if it's turkey, fish ala King.
{29220}{29294}Soyrent grinnu
{29304}{29406}Soylent battle|Soylent green, a classic ingredient of ??gurman?? cooking.
{29409}{29483}And the battle is on.
{29586}{29637}Akiyu, what's Elzar making?
{29640}{29675}Well Heroki-san,
{29678}{29847}when I asked him, he asked what bussines it was of mine and conjection that my mother was a prostitute.
{29850}{30075}In english countryside, many prostitutes decorate their rooms with festive gourds.
{30078}{30161}30 minutes to go.
{30222}{30275}Look at Bender roll that dough.
{30278}{30377}I've never seen such confident powerful strokes of the ass!
{30380}{30428}You've never seen mine.
{30431}{30472}No I haven't.
{30475}{30555}Fifteen minutes remaining.
{30663}{30740}The iron cook is bringing in his signature creation.
{30743}{30826}A working pastry replica of downtown Venice.
{30829}{31032}La donna e mobile, qual piuma al vento, muta d' accento...
{31035}{31087}Remember of turkey pastes?
{31090}{31166}Get you commemorate of turkey pastes.
{31169}{31192}You hook me up.
{31195}{31297}My turkey is dry and I've tried everything.
{31300}{31374}Allright, never mind.
{31447}{31557}Oh the guilt, the unbearable guilt.
{31569}{31643}Fifteen seconds.
{31669}{31710}Spice weasels.
{31713}{31784}Bam!
{31787}{31861}Ten seconds.
{32114}{32264}Master Sparkle, if you can hear me up there on that ditch I left you--
{32267}{32341}This is for you.
{32458}{32565}Time operrr (like "over" ???)
{32608}{32640}Tasting
{32643}{32733}The iron cook Neptunian is going all out to please the judges.
{32736}{32808}He's even garnished the salad with 100 dollar bills.
{32811}{32891}Let's see what they think.
{32957}{33085}Mmmm, soylent green is my kind of people.
{33167}{33302}??? Morbo will store this in his sack for future digestion.
{33305}{33384}I'm swiming in my own soylent waste.
{33387}{33461}It's a good thing.
{33480}{33530}Next up challenger Bender.
{33533}{33811}A student of the legendary Helmut Sparkel, Bender is some sort of wonderful mechanical man.
{33835}{33909}Oh, delicious.
{33919}{33986}This food looks kind of funky.
{33989}{34072}But it tastes kinda Funkey.
{34136}{34258}The challenger's ugly food has shown us.
{34280}{34438}that even hidious things can be sweet on the inside.
{34509}{34518}Judgement
{34521}{34565}And now, judgement.
{34568}{34631}The winner will become the new iron cook.
{34634}{34726}The looser is doomed to scrap.
{34753}{34817}Who's confection will achieve perfection.
{34820}{34942}Who's food stuff will be the good stuff.
{34990}{35064}Challenger-r Bender-r!
{35117}{35173}Hey!
{35176}{35210}That's my robot.
{35213}{35272}I own him!
{35275}{35337}You honor me chairman Koji.
{35340}{35404}Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto. /rhyme from the Styx's song Mr. Roboto/
{35407}{35497}Chairman-san, I came here with one goal.
{35500}{35588}To humiliate Elzar at large stadium.
{35591}{35639}I believe I've done that.
{35642}{35691}No question.
{35694}{35810}But the truth zen of flavour is not found in the coliseum.
{35813}{35914}It is found it the small kitchen, with friends.
{35917}{36005}That is why I decline the title of iron cook.
{36008}{36113}And except only the lesser title of zinc ??society??.
{36116}{36159}Which I just made up.
{36162}{36278}Also it comes with double price money.
{36353}{36413}Wait! Everyone must know.
{36416}{36521}I broke the professor's bottle ship.
{36524}{36688}And what is worst, I framed my dearest friend - Fry!
{36718}{36882}I can never repay in his 10 dollars, so I must take the only honorable path.
{36885}{36974}What with the killing myself.
{37079}{37153}Here I go already.
{37184}{37241}Oh?
{37244}{37351}That sword cost five dozen dollars!
{37389}{37463}Fry did it.
{37533}{37611}And that's how I defeated Elzar.
{37614}{37685}Thanks to Sparkle's magic liquid.
{37688}{37726}Yes, we were there.
{37729}{37835}And we just finished watching it again on TV.
{37838}{37951}Ummm, let me see that vial, Bender.
{38142}{38192}Oh, good Lord!
{38195}{38333}Accordind to the spectrolyzer, Sparkel's magic ingredient was--
{38336}{38410}Water! Ordinary water!
{38416}{38441}No...
{38444}{38547}Ah, so the real gift Sparkel gave you was confidence.
{38550}{38604}The confidence to be your best.
{38607}{38665}Yes, ordinary water,
{38668}{38809}Lased with nothing more than a few spoonfulls of LSD.
{38812}{38942}The importatnt thing is, by my standard, I won fair on square.
{38945}{39097}Now, who wants brunch, cooked with plenty of confidence.
{39100}{39174}-I'm here.|-???
{39188}{39288}}Translation:
{39398}{39498}}Speech recognition:|K5, Anabel Lee
{39521}{39621}}Text format and time-sync:|K5 using SubtitlesK5ky|/04-Apr-2003/